December 7, 2003

Sometimes I Just Want To Cry

If you haven't seen the previews yet, Warner Brothers. has decided to make The Iliad into a movie. A movie starring Brad Pitt as Achilles. (Yes, Homer did just roll over in his grave and you have permission to vomit if you must.)

The movie is not called The Iliad. No that would be much too hard for the viewing public to pronounce much less understand. Instead, the movie is called Troy. Ugh. Double Ugh. As much as I would like to think that this movie is going to be good, I am a hundred percent certain that it is going to suck and suck big time.

There is no way that a movie can do justice to the epic poem, especially when the trailer shows that Warner Brothers missed the whole point of the poem. The trailer sets the story off with this quote: "If love is worth fighting for, this is the greatest battle love has ever known." Or something to that effect. Oh boy. The Iliad isn't really about love at all. It is about rage. And more specifically: THE RAGE OF ACHILLES. Damn the movie is going to suck. I can feel it.

"Rage -- Goddess, sing the rage of Peleus' son Achilles,
murderous, doomed, that cost the Achaeans countless losses,
hurling down to the House of Death so many sturdy souls,
great fighters' souls, but made their bodies carrion,
feasts for the dogs and birds,
and the will of Zeus was moving towards its end.
Begin, Muse, when the two first broke and clashed,
Agamemnon lord of men and brilliant Achilles."

Once I see this movie, and see it I will, the Muse will be singing about the rage of Pernicious.

Note: I saw in the trailer that there is a Trojan Horse. So the movie goes beyond the scope of the Iliad which ends with the burial of Hector breaker of horses. So it may not be completely based on The Iliad. Eh, it is still going to suck.

Posted by Pernicious at December 7, 2003 5:42 PM | TrackBack

They'll try and get Socrates and hemlock in there somewhere. It's all greek to Hollywood.

Posted by: at December 16, 2003 7:36 AM

Of course it's going to suck, Wolfgang Petersen directed. The guy hasn't made a good movie since DAS BOOT.

Posted by: James at December 18, 2003 11:06 AM

Why can't they just leave well enough alone? Why?

Posted by: Pernicious at December 25, 2003 10:00 PM
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